Thursday, 14 April 2016

Barcelona are bad now

Barcelona were punted out of the Champions League on Wednesday evening as they forgot they are actually supposed to be really good and very wealthy, losing to a team who tries really hard instead. Like society in reverse or a Jeremy Corbyn dream.


Leo Messi was actually largely anonymous throughout and played a lot like someone currently undergoing a massive fraudulent tax investigation. The classic signs were all there - slow, playing through the middle and not scoring goals. Clearly he is worried that inland revenue people were there to take away his freedom.

Now that Barcelona have lost to Atletico Madrid, it is time to announce that Atletico are the best team in the world and will win the champions cup, using it to drink the blood of their enemies. Or as the judge in my unrelated and ongoing court case keeps making me call them, "the innocent victims on that dreadful night".