Thursday, 30 October 2014

Twitter is expensive for footballers

If you're like me, you don't really consider Twitter as real life. I'm not a troll, racist, sexist or a cyber rapist but I still like making jokes about banter on Richard Keys timeline. I know I'm safe, nobody cares about me, but what if you're a footballer with your millions of fans? It turns out you have to pay actual money if you want to call someone a dick.

he was genuinely fined for using the term "choc ice"

Rio Ferdinand was recently fined £25k for using the word "sket" which is a word that men desperately trying to hang on to their youth and look cool use for slut. "Think before you tweet" is the message from the FA. Really they don't want anyone to think, as they have made £350,000 from twitter fines since 2011. If you think about how much money that is, that would pay for Ronaldo for one whole week. You could play him upfront, wide right or just ask him to poach eggs, the sky's the limit.

The biggest fine was dished out to Ashley Cole, he received a £90k fine for  hilariously calling the FA "a bunch of twats". I think Twitter fines should be banned, it's great to see what players are genuinely funny and intelligent on Twitter and which ones are Wayne Rooney. To give it some context, all these chaps are millionaires, do they give a shit about a few grand? I made a joke the other day about Joey Barton murdering people and hiding them under the floor boards. If you told me that tweet was going to cost me £1, I'd throw that coin right at your face and laugh heartily as I click tweet.

@jackwaterston