Sunday, 18 May 2014

Stevie May is a dick

St Johnstone won the Scottish cup this weekend, beating Dundee United 2-0 at Celtic Park.  It would have been three but Stevie May had a goal ruled out.  For punching the ball in.  YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO USE YOUR HANDS YOU TIT



I was already well on my way to drunkland by the time Stevie May threw the ball into the goal in an attempt to score St Johnstone's second, so I didn't even realise the goal was ruled out until... now.  And why I'm awake at 7.53am on a Sunday is anyone's guess, though judging by the clothes I was wearing when I woke up some time ago, I may have passed out earlier than usual and this is why.

Either way, Stevie May is a penis.

Oh and congratulations to St Johnstone.  It's not only their first trophy ever - 130 years without one - but I think it was also like their very first major final too.  I suspect their fans may have enjoyed it slightly.  Also the game wasn't completely shit like the Aberdeen League Cup final.  Did I tell you about that one yet?  I'm sure I must have.  We won by the way