Tuesday, 18 March 2014

FIFA want to put Nicolas Anelka in space jail

Nicolas Quenelle-ka was fired by West Brom the other day for gross misconduct because his mate hates Jewish people.  Hurrah!

The French player is friends with some comedian guy whose name I'm not going to Google because he doesn't deserve it.  Before you jump on your high horse, I genuinely did lots of research on this quenelle thing because loads of young Frenchies claim it's 'anti-establishmet' and has nothing to do with being anti-semitic.  The only problem here is that it definitely is, because all of those people do the salute outside Synagogues which I can't believe I spelled correctly there and because the guy that invented it genuinely thinks there's a global Jewish conspiracy to rule the world.

I also totally forgot that you can fire people in football land like it's a real job or something.  The only people I've heard being fired are Adrian Mutu for doing shit loads of cocaine and Nicolas Anelka for this incident.  This makes sense, because if I did either of those things I also would be fired.  Ha ha!  We're the same!  This must finally mean that I'm safe to go out and kung fu kick that crystal palace fan from my office in the face!  Paid leave?!  YES PLEASE!  nothing can go wrong!