Thursday, 6 February 2014

Rene Meulensteen might be shit

Fulham were struggling for results not so long ago and fired under-performing Martin Jol to replace him with his mate, Rene Meulensteen.  I mean mate like friend, not like in the animal kingdom


Back then, Fulham were only winning some of their games and since Meulensteen once touched Alex Ferguson - who as we all know is made from magic - it was assumed that he would lead the London club to glory.  Or alternatively, mid table.  Instead, the failing Dutchman has masterminded a direct plummet to the bottom of the Premier league table with absolutely no end of losing in sight.  They even lost to Sheffield United, who I thought had given up after that whole Carlos Tevez thing.

Anyway now apparently Alan Curbishley is set to replace the former Manchester United coach because he has special 'avoiding the drop' powers.  These are the same powers shared by Alex Mcleish, Steve Bruce and any other manager guaranteed to bore you to tears within only a few days of managing your football club.  But by god he gets results, you stupid chief.

If Fulham do get relegated the only people who will care are Damien Duff, Uri Gellar and Mohamed Al Fayed, who will be so distraught by the fortunes of his former club that he will inflate to 300 times his normal size and terrorise the city of London


You have all been warned.  And no doubt the tube drivers will be on strike then too.  Are they unaware that computers exist?  It's about the stupidest strike I've ever heard.  Why is it people who go on strike look like they've never once thought about how businesses actually work.  It's not some guy in an office going 'oh I think I'd like to throw some money away at random people, like that overweight man there' who suddenly changes his mind and yells 'TAKE THEIR MONEY AWAY, SUFFOCATE THEM FINANCIALLY QUICKLY I NEED TO EAT ALL OF THE MONEY'.

In most of Europe the trains are all run remotely.  I'd just go and learn how to do that instead.

You whinging cunts