Tuesday, 7 January 2014

Theo Walcott is broken

Poor little Theo Walcott is set to miss another world cup after his leg fell off against Tottenham.


Walcott had been on form until he suffered what it is called a 'anteater crucial ligament' injury and now we get to listen and read to lots of people who once played football telling us about what strikers Arsenal need to buy.  Ray Parlour said 'holy shitting christ, i can't believe he's gone. You should never have taken him away from us god, he was so young ARHGHRGHRGH" and then he broke down in tears and a lorry ran him over.

Luckily for Theo Walcott he has two knees and this means that the other one might be ready in time for Brazil 2014.  The good news for England fans is that even if he has that leg amputated and the ligament one is still damaged, he will still be 80% better than Aaron Lennon.