Thursday, 19 December 2013

Chelsea are going to sign Diego Costa

Jose Mourinho hates his strikers so much that he is one mouse click on silk road away from having them "transferred with the fishes".  His plan is to beg for Diego Costa


The treacherous Brazilian Spaniard is one of the only sort of available strikers in Europe that isn't Dr Evil expensive, and is also good enough to fulfil all of Jose's needs.  Since Fernando Torres is basically like Jesus to Atletico Madrid fans, he might be involved in a swap plus money deal, according to my sources who this time are not that guy who asks me for money on the train.

I can't help but feel that including modern Fernando Torres in addition to money in a swap purchase deal for Diego Costa is sort of like when you buy a box of rice krispies only to find a toy inside.  'Oh no way! I hadn't even noticed that was there' and then you throw it in the bin because it's fucking useless