Monday, 18 November 2013

The French like to Surrender

What is wrong with France? Despite having players like Pogba, Scar-face, Benzema and the Melted Lesbian, they still lost 2-0 to Ukraine and probably won't qualify for the World Cup in Brazil. Now the French public have turned against them, and nobody is surprised.

In one French newspaper, 60,000 people replied to a poll asking if France would qualify - 61% said no. In another paper, 20,000 people cast their vote to which 84% said they wouldn't qualify. Basically the French public have given up on their own country...again. One question was "will you continue to support France in spite of everything (everything meaning they are shite)?" and only 16% said yes. It was kind of like in WW2 when they were asked if they would fight the Nazis and be awesome like Britain and they said "do you like the Mona Lisa? Do you want it? What about the Eiffel Tower? Take it as well!". Luckily for them they were eventually saved by Dave Benson-Phillips and Pat Sharp. My school couldn't afford history books. 

It must be hard so support a team of massive cunts like Evra. I want France to qualify because they will either click and be really good, or have a complete meltdown and end up settling their differences with a giant game of naked sumo, before Hugo Lloris steals a hovercraft and runs over Giroud.