Tuesday, 15 October 2013

Ronaldo is sexy - says Arnie

Messi or Ronaldo, Ronaldo or Messi - who's better? Well it's Messi, but who has bigger muscles? That's all Arnie cares about.

There is Arnie giving it the cobra, from what looks like an archive photo from an old Nazi science experiment. For some reason Arnold was talking about Ronaldo and his ripped body. The world's greatest actor believes that Ronaldo is the world's greatest footballer because he has great abs and biceps and Arnie likes that.

The man who brought us such incredible characters as Detective John Kimble, Dutch, the Governor of California, Hauser, the Terminator, Harry Tasker and of course Mr Freeze - had some inspirational words of wisdom -
"Each and everybody is born with its own assets, it own strengths and weaknesses. I found it very easy to develop my biceps and my chest, but harder to improve my calves and thighs."
That's all I needed to hear, I'm going to give up a career in the oil and gas industry and live at my parents house forever and write a sitcom. Arnie and Cristiano play father in a son, in a slapstick comedy based around the hilarious goings on at a factory that makes frozen pizzas. Arnie is the elder lothario, always dodging work to try and get yet another lady in to bed with a flex of his muscles. Cristiano much to his Dad's dismay, can't even speak to a female without embarrassing himself and prefers to spend all his time thinking up new ideas for pizza toppings. "A laugh out loud comedy", "the funniest TV show since 'Will and Grace'" "catch a slice of the action this Thursday" is what they will say. "Pizza Boys, starts November 7th".

If it fails, well at least I'll have plenty time to work on my biceps.