Friday, 9 August 2013

Raheem Sterling loves assault

Raheem Sterling was arrested last night on suspicion of assault.  What a world


The 19 year old has now been arrested more times than he's scored Premiership goals and also has about 3 children to 4 different mothers or something like that.  Jamaican born and English raised, if it weren't for football this guy would be prime Jeremy Kyle material.  The Liverpool winger has previously said that he wants to put all of his controversial past behind him, but I can't help but feel like assaulting people might be the wrong way to do it.  He should try playing Civilisation on his iPad instead - not only will he get so addicted that he runs out of time to assault people but also he will realise that he needs to go out and get some friends instead of sitting alone in a darkened room building submarines.  OH GOD HELP