The former Hibs player has been charged with theft, breach of the peace, and assault which coincidentally were also my favourite of the missing 7 dwarves. Or the 10 dwarves I guess. Regardless this is the real life news quote:
It is alleged that on January 26 this year at the Tesco Store in Meadow Place Road, Edinburgh, he stole a quantity of water and juice; shouted, swore and threw items of liquid to the floor; and assaulted an employee in the store, by struggling with him and attempting to punch him on the body.In terms of bellends, Griffiths ranks right up the top in the bellend section, on the helmet sofa. When he enters a room the average IQ goes down. It's really annoying that he's actually a very good footballer but I bet in about 10 years he'll be on TV and say "ho ho ho what a renegade I was! Oh I was so silly back then wasn't I? lololol luckily I'm all sensible and have kids now" when in actual fact he should probably be in jail.
It's like those dudes in gangs in America who when they reach 40 and just cannot be arsed fighting random other people from a few streets down decide to start programs to help mislead kids. Sorry mate, but you still stabbed someone soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo no dice