Monday, 6 May 2013

Wilfried Zaha's Brother is a Gangster

Wilfried Zaha will be joining Manchester United this summer to kick balls around and make money. His brother prefers to kick people in the face or stab them to make money.

I better be careful what I type, he might cycle his BMX up to the North-East of Scotland and shoot me. Apparently Wilfried's brother Herve (officially known as Wilfried Zaha's brother) is a "general" in the notorious DSN crew. The tabloids did a google search and found his old Bebo page where he bigs up his DSN mandem - a gang that fights with other gangs over astro-turf pitches. Coming from a middle-class background, I can only assume that is what "turf wars" are. There's lots of other scary talk about killing people and putting them in freezers, but it is all from back in 2009. I checked his Twitter and the scariest thing on their is his grammar.

Obviously a total badass, he received a 12-month conditional discharge for criminal damage (I have no idea what that means) last summer, for throwing a paving slab through a woman's car window as she was sitting in the drivers seat. In fairness, she shouldn't have driven through the middle of an intense game of "throw the slab". Herve was fined £280, that'll teach him! £280? No wonder this country is full of fuck-heads.