Wednesday, 29 May 2013

Gareth Bale would totally leave

Spurs fans beware!  Your precious G Bale would consider a move to Real Madrid according to his agent, and any sane human being in the world ever.

Gareth's agent, Jonathan Barnett, told a Spanish television show:
If somebody like Mr Perez was interested in Gareth Bale it would be a great honour and we would listen
This is football code for "please make a ridiculous offer so I can bathe in money and hire a chimpanzee to live around the house and also be in Spain" except maybe not the chimpanzee bit because I guess Gareth Bale is already about 80% ape anyway.  Maybe he doesn't want to live with G Bale.  He's always doing push ups and sit ups and drinking those protein shakes, leaving them everywhere.  He's just a terrible room mate, basically.  Not like me.  You should live with me Jonathan Barnett, DON'T LEAVE ENGLAND OH GOD