Saturday, 6 April 2013

Man United have no sound

Manchester United have successfully managed to outprice all of their gross poor fans and now only the wealthy Marks and Spencers lovers can afford to go to games.  "Singing?  Singing is for the slaves!" they say, and that's why United hired a guy.


The club have appointed an 'acoustic engineer', which means roughly that they're going to try and work out a way to stop all of the non-sound from escaping from Old Trafford and give it some atmosphere.  They could do this by maybe mic-ing up sections of the crowd that do sing, or building like noise traps to retain the sound but my favourite suggestion is to have Daft Punk play a live set during the game because I like Daft Punk.  Do you like Daft Punk?  What am I saying, of course you do.

Wait - HO HAHAHAH maybe they could move Old Trafford to the moon because there's MORE ATMOSPHERE THERE    PRAWN SANDWICHES  HA H H HAH H A