Friday, 12 April 2013

Bale Banana Beast is Banned

That's how you write a fucking headline! In other news, some 23 year old Arsenal fan has been banned from attending any football games for three years.

The Independent did about the most sarcastic article I think I've ever read on this guy, but he deserves it because he's an idiot. Here are some quotes from that article that I particularly enjoyed:

The court heard that he was a regular at games and on the day was seen shouting: "F*** off, come on then you c****," at Spurs fans.
Like I said, he's clearly a lovely chap and just misunderstood. Surely the banana throwing was just part of a hilarious joke he and his friends concocted at their weekly comedy improv sessions!

Flint, who, the court heard, has no interests other than football, was sentenced to a three-year football banning order, fined £250 and ordered to pay costs of £85 and a £25 victim surcharge
So does Gareth Bale get £25 every time someone throws a banana at him? Because I want that job. Then again it's a pretty scumbaggy thing to do - to throw fruit at another person - so I doubt many other people in the world would be as foolish and irresponsibly behaved as he and I wouldn't make much money. I bet his friends are all deeply ashamed.

The hearing had to be adjourned for five minutes while a waiting defendant was removed because he kept laughing and shouting out comments.

You stay classy, those who are destined to eternally remain a part of the justice system.