Wednesday, 27 March 2013

World Cup Qualifying Expert Round-up by me

Last night saw all of the home nations try and win some points in their world cup qualifying groups, and none of them did.  England got a point but that doesn't count.


Scotland were absolutely dreadful again and apart from an offside goal that Steven Naismith got, they deserved to lose 2-0 to Serbia.  Serbia is famous for two things: being cold and war


They're also famous for siberian tigers and Slobodan Milosevic, so how come Scotland couldn't beat them?  Because they're pish.  Gordon Strachan said:
"It's not a quick-fix to get as strong and as technically gifted as that, that's for sure," Strachan said.
"It was heavy going and I thought technically they were a right good side and physically they were stronger than us, so that gave us a problem."
If you had to train in the snow everyday, surrounded by tigers and Slobodan Milosevic, you'd probably develop an excellent first touch and understanding of the game too.  Scottish independence might finally give us the insane tyrannical ruling we need to compete for third place in World Cup qualifying groups.  SOLD!


Meanwhile, in Montenegro, England stuttered to a measly point despite having a team of famous people to choose from.  Everyone has heard of Steven Gerrard but still they couldn't overcome a team from a place that if you asked me to draw it on a map I would draw a penis instead and say 'I don't know where that place is'.  Montenegro spent all week winding up the England players and it worked.  1-1

Gareth Bale lost to Croatia despite taking the lead with a penalty.  It's not really surprising but despite the loss, at least Scotland made Wales look so good the other night that Chris Coleman will get to keep his job.

Northern Ireland probably lost - I'm not even going to check that one.

Southern Ireland drew 2-2 with Austria.

I won none of my bets

I HATE FOOTBALL SO MUCCCCHHHHHHHHH