Sad news for Liverpool fans as dependable Jamie Carragher has announced that he will retire at the end of the season
Now 400 years old, Carragher first played for Liverpool back in the 70s and has transformed them several times from champions of Europe to mid table under achievers. Now that he is only slightly faster than the chairlift in his house, Jamie has decided to retire and invent new Monopoly pieces better than a cat because nobody wants a cat. They should have followed my idea and made one of the prophet Mohammed to increase religious tolerance between everyone. When will they learn!?!