Mario Balotelli has just signed for AC Milan if the internet isn't lying. And you wouldn't lie to me, would you the internet? WOULD YOU???!?!?!!
The Italian club has just confirmed that the striker will have a medical on Wednesday and then end the transfer saga that literally everyone has predicted since sometime last year. The only surprising thing about this is that no-one has died in a fire as a direct result of his actions yet, but then again most of the stories about Balotelli are absolute nonsense. If the Guardian ran a story about him turning his private jet into a sexy disco, you'd have a queue outside it every night. Yet when I open a sexy disco it's all "you can't do that, someone died in there"