At one point Andy Van Der Meyde was "the next big thing". Then he decided he liked booze, sex and drugs more than football and became shit. Now he's written a book.
This is what he used to look like in a previous life. This is what he looks like now.
Usually a footballer's autobiography is a turgid piece of self-indulgent rabble. Van Dery Meyde's is more than likely self-indulgent but at least he has things other than money to talk about. In his book that is just about to come out, or is out already (I forget), he tells us about his addiction to drugs, booze and some mental stripper he met that destroyed his marriage. Eventually he had to get out of Liverpool because he was going to party himself to death.
Everton paid this twat £30k a week to sit on his every expanding fat arse every weekend and party every night. It's hilarious to read about him having a go at David Moyes for having the audacity to ask him to train. At one point Moyes took him by the throat and thought about killing him, after finally being pushed over the edge. He didn't because that would be murder and murder is bad.
Now trying to turn his life around, Andy is taking his UEFA coaching badges and hoping to return to football. In case you wondered, he still hates David Moyes and thinks Phil Neville is a twat.