Wednesday, 5 September 2012

Malouda has been banished

Florent Malouda has spoken of his dismay at being forced to train with Chelsea's youth team because he is unwanted, like a puppy after Christmas, my football betting advice, or yo momma.

Look at that happy, smiling face.  In years gone by Malouda was a wanted one; coveted by many of Europe's elite clubs he eventually settled on London's Chelsea, transferring for £13.5million only five years ago.  Now, at the age of 32, he has been forced to hang out with a bunch of teenagers.

Don't fell too bad for him though because not only is he still getting paid a LOT of money to do what you did when you were 15 after school, all day, but he's also totally shit.  I haven't seen him do anything that made me think "man that guy is a great player" ever, on any occasion I've ever seen him play.  And I know great players - I once hooked up with a girl outside a bar who saw me being started on whilst wearing a robot costume which I made by myself.  Out of crisp boxes and tin foil.

True story.