Luka Modric is refusing to train in an effort to force a move to Real Madrid or Chelsea or Manchester United or any other team that wants to pay for him - and making himself look like a royal cock in the process.
Modric looks like a really ugly girl but he plays football so that will never be a concern for him. Last season he wanted a move to Chelsea but was convinced to stay. Spurs then had the easiest chance of getting into the Champions League ever and completely ballsed it up. It probably had something to do with Harry Redknapp whoring himself out for the England job and his face melting when he didn't get it.
Spurs' Chairman Daniel Levy is in America with his ill wife, I don't mean ill in a Beastie Boys way, I mean she's in hospital - and he is said to be rather unpleased with Luka. Rather than fly out to LA, Modric phoned Van der Vaart and said "screw you guys, I'm going home" and buggered off to Croatia. In retaliation, Levy is going to fine him £15,000 for every day he's not at training. The money will go towards building a jousting ring, where you can watch retired footballers settle their differences on horseback. First up is Andy Cole and Teddy Sheringham. My moneys on Cole.