Tuesday, 19 June 2012

Rooney's back: England win tournament

It was too good to be true. For the first time in history the impossibly arrogant and delusional English press didn't actually think that England would win a major tournament. Then Rooney had to come along and ruin it for everyone.

Look at that technique,  textbook. That photograph is of course the reason that Rooney has not played so far. With him missing, the whole England setup has been delightfully reserved in their expectations. Now back in the frame, he's burst onto the seen and shouted his big, loud scouse face off about how England could win the tournament.

Rooney thinks England have the players, they have the organisation and they are good enough to win the tournament. I thought we'd all been over this? You're not good enough Wayne, everything was so nice until you came back and started speaking, you've ruined everything! 

England play hosts Ukraine tonight in a winner takes all, unless it'a draw and then there is no winner but England still take it all-the all being qualification of course. That really slipped off the tongue. I'm not giving into the hype but I have put a tenner on Rooney scoring four goals and England to win the World Cup tonight on penalties.