Joey Barton is probably going to be banned for 100 years after trying to attack all of Manchester City but don't worry, because Wayne Rooney is here to help calm him down. UPDATE: It turns out this isn't actually Wayne Rooney, and is instead a parody account. Whoops
Rooney's comments were in reply to Joey Barton having a go at Alan Shearer, and I think it's nice that he's keeping Joey in touch with his imprisoned brother. If there's one thing I know about having an imprisoned brother it's that they are truly delicious if had with Brannigans crisps. Wait, that doesn't sound right.
I meant sandwiches. I meant that sandwiches are delicious.