Monday, 21 May 2012

Obi Wan Mikel psyched out Robben

Chelsea midfielder John-Obi Mikel has revealed the extraordinary mind powers he possesses and how it was he that forced Arjen Robben to miss his extra time penalty in the Champions League final.

The Nigerian told reporters that he told Robben would miss and this psychological warfare subconsciously made the Dutch winger put the ball into Petr Cech's hands:
“I went up to him and said it in his ear. I told him that Petr Cech knew where he was going to kick it so he was going to miss.
“Petr went the right way. It wasn’t information he had about Robben but it’s something you try and do from time to time. It’s fair enough.”
After this Mikel was immediately called to a crime scene by the FBI to try and piece together the clues and get in the mind of the killer using his psychic abilities.  "DAMN IT MAN, HE'LL KILL AGAIN!" they yelled at Mikel, who stamped his feet, sat down and cried on the floor.  "I just wanted attention!  That's all I wanted.  No-one ever talks about me in the press" he wailed and then the chief of police got him a McDonalds.  DELICIOUS