Thursday, 31 May 2012

Martinez has decided to stay

Roberto Martinez went out for a walk last week and met up with a bunch of people but he didn't really like them that much so he's gonna stay at home now.  JOURNALISM


The Wigan manager met up with Liverpool's owners and either passed on the opportunity or wasn't offered it and then went round to Aston Villa's house but there were lots of people from Birmingham there and he had to escape.  Now he has confirmed his 'commitment' to Wigan thanks to the fact that no-one else has offered him anything better, and chairman Dave Whelan is delighted.
"We're just so pleased that he's staying with us for another season,  "We've discussed a lot of things and it was a productive afternoon. He's got two years left on his current contract and we will be looking to extend that.
"We've also agreed to build up the academy and the training facilities."
How wonderfully generous of him to agree to stay at the place that he's legally contracted to.  Perhaps we should buy him some flowers, too?  This whole thing sounds like when you walk around the floor of a nightclub to see if any hotties are in, and you find a couple so you go up and say "hey, how's it going?" but they don't really seem into you, and besides you've only got a tenner in your pocket and you don't really like the music anyway, so you just wander home with a kebab leaving answer phone messages for your friends and wake up in your bed, next to your wife.  "I love you baby" you say.

ROMANCE MOTHERFUCKER