Monday, 28 May 2012

FA want to develop children

The FA has decided that it would quite like to win something in the future and that to achieve this England might have to produce players that aren't shite. All hail our new overlord, Gareth Southgate.

The penalty missing pizza advert star has been touring the country doing keynote presentations on changes that need to be made to youth development in the country and these have been approved in a vote sometime today or yesterday or something. And it probably wasn't keynote, Southgate looks like he'd be terrified to use anything other than Power Point layered with word art and arrows pointing to jpegs. hahahaha what a loser - get with the times, man.

The changes mean that children under the age of 13 wont play on full size pitches anymore. Why on earth were children playing on full size pitches in the first place? Basing it on my own Olympian athleticism, it would take like a day for an 8 year old to run the length of that... how have these changes not been in place the entire time? Scotland have responded by announcing their plan to revamp their youth development by adding vegetables and cutlery to the pre match meals and occasionally letting the kids stand on different mountains to kick it to each other. Fucking gee it laldy son