Monday, 21 May 2012

Craig Gordon is abandoned

Sunderland have released about 9 players into the wild to fend for themselves, including former Scotland number one, Craig Gordon.


The goalkeeper was signed for £9million back in 2007 but has only managed to feature in about exactly 95 games if my memory serves me well, or if you don't buy that because the BBC says so.  Along with several reserve players, Gordon has been sent to the scrap heap for spare parts and now has to convince someone to sign him despite having been injured for the last five years.  Or he could just retire and live in the scrap yard as a terrifying human/wolf hybrid, hunting those too naive to regard him as a real threat.  As he leaps from beneath a car bonnet to feast upon the brains of a father and son looking for some new headlights, he'll turn his head to the moon and howl, like the creature of the night he has become.

Or he could sign for Hearts or something.  Either way I don't care.  I'd prefer the scrap yard wolf version, if I'm perfectly honest.