Sunday, 1 April 2012

David Luiz is injured

Chelsea defender David Luiz has been injured.  I know you're probably devastated right now, but the news only gets worse because he might miss a game during the week.  Stay strong, my friend.

The sometimes clown sidekick was taken off during Chelsea's 4-2 victory over Aston Villa because his ligaments hurt or something like that.  Di Matteo said:
We'll have to wait for 48 hours to asses David Luiz
FUCKING HELL WHAT A STORY.  This is the kind of journalism that is sure to land me in the big time and then I can hang around celebrities and go to glamorous parties until the day I can finally afford to go to rehab.  Normal rehab isn't quite so glamorous, it's full of minks and all the people don't have teeth.  Can I borrow a fiver please?