Tuesday, 17 April 2012

Andy Carroll is behaved

Andy Carroll has laughed off suggestions that he's a piss-head by telling reporters that he's settled down since he moved to Liverpool and that they should just shut up, yeh?


The Geordie striker has a reputation as a 'hard-drinker' having spent most of his available time knee deep in pints when he wasn't playing football for Newcastle, but claims he's finally got himself sorted out.  He told The Sun:
My past is my past. I changed my lifestyle when I came to Liverpool and settled down. I love it here.  People will say to me ‘Oh, you were in the boozer last week’ but it is just rumours going round.  Now I just laugh it off. To be honest, I don’t go out at all.  I know what people say is not true, my family knows it’s not true and the club knows it’s not true.  All I do now is sit in the house with my girlfriend, chill out and watch movies.
You are so wise Andy Carroll.  I should take heed from this young man because at this very moment I am hungover beyond words, except for the words I am writing right now to describe how little I ever want to drink again, but then again I am not worth £35million.  Coincidentally, neither is Andy Carroll so we've actually got quite a lot in common really.  And by that I mean I'm hungover.  I WISH I WAS FUNNY