Saturday, 17 March 2012

Referee Steve Conroy has had enough

Steve Conroy is a man.  A man who had a vision of a football world where referees are high fliers and lavished with praise for their incredible decision making skills.  Then he gave a penalty for a Rangers player diving.  Then he got told to referee a game with Berwick and Queens Park.  Then he quit.


The 45 year old used to enjoy those matches where he took charge of Old Firm New Year clashes in front of a stadium of thousands and a TV audience of even more.  Beloved throughout the land of Scottish football, Steve had it all in the palm of his hand.  But then people stopped caring about the referee.  Dropped further and further down the superstar list, Conroy had to sleep in his car, driving to random venues during the week to referee prison games, high-school matches and 5-a-sides at Goals, pushing his body to the limit, just to make ends meet.

Ever since that day he awarded a penalty to Rangers for Sone Aluko falling over in the box, life wasn't the same.  Just when things couldn't get any worse, the phone rang.  "This could be it!  My shot at the big time, Joanne!" (Joanne is probably his wife in this story) "This is what we've been waiting for, I told you I still got it.  I told you baby!  I told you!"

"Hi this is the SFA"
"omg omg omg omg omg"
"We know things haven't been going so well but we want to give you another chance.  We'd like you.... to referee Berwick Rangers vs Queens Park in Scotland's Third Division match on Saturday!!!"
".........."
"Mr Conroy?"
" *sound of gun and screaming* "


All joking aside, that would be my actual reaction if someone phoned me up and tried to pay me to go and watch that same game.  Not even referee it.  Just to go there.