Friday, 23 March 2012

Barcelona want David Luiz

Chelsea face a real BATTLE to keep defender David Luiz at the club because Barcelona really want to sign him, according to some newspapers who need to fill space.


The Portuguese player won major points from us when he was really nice to departed manager Andre Villas-Boas, and his silky skills have impressed all of those watching Chelsea this year who don't understand what defending is.  Mascherano currently plays as a centre back for the 'greatest team in the world' but when you have Lionel Messi up front, you could play one of the pandas from Edinburgh zoo in defence and still not have to worry about not winning.  You could even play me and still get a draw.

Plus, Luiz can run forwards, score goals and is tall enough to reach headers without the aid of a step ladder like Mascherano has never actually had to.  All this is yours for only £35million provided you can defeat the last boss on the way out, which is Abramovich dressed in his latest robot creation on his space station, as I like to imagine he spends the rest of his money.


100% SCIENCE!