Monday, 13 February 2012

Celtic to sign Edinho Junior

Celtic celebrated the financial demise of their blue friends by lining up a £500k bid for someone called Edinho Junior. I've been assured he is a real person, despite the fact that he sounds like a player from International Superstar Soccer Deluxe on the Super Nintendo.

That could be him. Edinho is a 17 year old Portuguese male man who plays as a forward. To try and get everyone really excited the Scottish Sun labeled him as a "wonder kid". He doesn't even have a wikipedia page yet so if you get in early enough you can go and create an entirely fictitious life for a real person. It's really fun, trust me. Some of you may not know but Edinho's cousin is actually Barry from Eastenders.

I don't know what's going on because I thought the transfer window was closed? Maybe he'll sign in the summer. Is he good? Nobody actually knows but a club in Scotland are buying someone for £500k, isn't that exciting? No? Well did you know Edinhos's favourite ice-cream flavour is chunky monkey and he has an irrational fear of cauliflower? Yeah that's right. Oh and he's really fast and wants to play in Scotland because his Dad once played for Dunfermline. That's boring but he once played table tennis with Noel Edmunds. The game was ruined by Mr Blobby running in and destroying the table with his fat hands.