Monday, 13 February 2012

'Arry wants Paul Scholes to play for England

Everyone's favourite non-tax evader, Harry Redknapp has made it clear that he would like 38 year old Paul Scholes to play for England in Euro 2012.

Everyone has already decided that Redknapp can just take over the England job once the season is finished and pretty much treat it like he's the manager of a summer camp, so everything he says about any English player obviously means he wants them to play for England.  The rubber faced media darling said:
"You'd love to have Paul Scholes in the Euros,"
"He'd be in your team, he's that good. He plays like a Spaniard, he can play like Xavi and Iniesta. He doesn't give the ball away."
Yes and while you're at it you should probably take David Beckham because he puts in wicked crosses, and then Alan Shearer because he has a cracking right foot.  Or maybe dig up Stanley Matthews and use him like a remote control robot.  You may not remember but about a month ago Paul Scholes was retired.  That means he's very old and can't run around very much - useful traits for an international footballer.

Actually Paul Scholes has been pretty great since he started playing again so I guess this makes sense.  I just pretend to be really smug and mean sometimes so that I appear cool.  All I really want is attention. *looks off into distance*