"Big" Chris Simba (hello ladies!) has been linked with Tottenham Hotspurs today after a rumour, which probably started on Twitter, surfaced about the Venky's being open to selling a 'star' in the window.
Despite the fact that no-one knows how old he actually is, Samba claims to be 27 and his 6ft 4in of Congolese power would be a useful addition to Harry's side every time that Ledley King has his knee fixed by having another human leg attached to his body. I'm pretty sure murder police should go and check out his garden to find the rest of those dismembered bodies that keep popping up around London. He's like an athletic Jack the Ripper, but less sexually aggressive. A friendly Jack the Ripper, if you will.
For legal reasons I'd like to say that Ledley King is definitely not a serial killer. YET!