Thursday, 19 January 2012

More footballers accused of sexual assault

Fucking everyone's at it now.  Some Brighton and Bournemouth players have possibly followed in Demarcus La Shonda's inappropriate footsteps and are under arrest by police, as they investigate a claim by a woman that she was sexually assaulted.

Six players, all between the ages of 18 and 24 have been arrested in connection with the alleged crime, and a 20 year old woman has filed the claim, which refers to an incident from last July.  I'd really like it if we could just have a happy sex story now and again about a footballer instead of all these inconvenient and depressing rapey ones.  There are of course two sides to every story and now I have a slightly better understanding of British libel and defamation laws it's hard to make anything funny out of either of them, so instead let's all just look at a picture of Kermit the frog's stupid face.  If you don't laugh when you see it, you have no soul, or are a sex offender.

Your alleged sex crimes are forgiven FitbaThatba reader!  Unless you didn't even smile, which means you're going to jail.  MUPPETS IN JAAAAAAAIL