So I thought I'd take the opportunity to point out that almost every single rumour you hear about Mario Balotelli right now has been invented on Twitter, except this one about him being banned from his own house. Because that actually happened.
Yes, the mansion that Mario Balotelli has set fire to, tried to build a go kart racing track in the garden of, and lived in for the past few months is actually not his own, and some random guy owns it. Because of the disputed bill for the damage that Mario has caused since his tenancy began, the landlord has told him he isn't allowed back in until he pays up, and the fee is reported to be in the region of tens of thousands.
Mario says he's being ripped off and since he isn't exactly shy about throwing money at stuff, he probably really is being done and we should all back him up here. Also, Metro say that Balotelli received a police caution last year for trying to set off £1500 of pyrotechnics in a city centre flat and I didn't know about that one, so there's another reason to support our new hero. He shouldn't be fined, he should be rewarded! And he shall reward us back, by building the world's largest lizard tank in Manchester town square like I read on the internet.