Tuesday, 3 January 2012

AVB hates Frank Lampard

Frank Lampard seems to be hell bent on getting Andre Villas-Boas fired because he's a jerk, and AVB doesn't like him.  'Cause that's how he rolls.  The Sun even reports that the manager totally blanked his midfielder after scoring the winner against Wolves.

image from soccer360.com
Despite AVB rightly pointing out that his team definitely can't win the Premiership and that they are in a state of transition, Lampard keeps trying to get his friends to all come together and find that 'winning team-spirit that they used to have', or just anything he can to undermine his boss.  From BBC:
"[We can't] drop our standards and just think 'let's just fight for fourth' or whatever.
"We're too good for that. In my eyes we should be challenging for the top."
It seems as if Lampard thinks he actually lives at Stamford Bridge and can't believe that he isn't the first name on the team sheet.  "How dare someone new come along and change the way things used to be!" he cries while rubbing his throat to allow a tin of Quality Streets to glide down into his belly.

Yes, Chelsea should be challenging for the top, but in 2008 when their players were three years younger and weren't all acting like childish cunts.  The Portuguese speaking players all seemed delighted in the 'not at all cringeworthy group hug' on Chelsea's sidelines yesterday, but apparently AVB doesn't talk to Lampard much.  Probably because he's too busy eating pies.  Because that's why he doesn't speak to him, you can't hear a thing above the tumble-dryer like noise of Lampard consuming pies.  Have I made that joke before?  Why am I always so mean about Frank Lampard?  So many questions, so little time.