Wednesday, 28 December 2011


Gillingham winger Chris Whelpdale is famous right now because he split his ball sack open during a game.  And yes I think that probably was quite sore.

The 22 year old was playing on Boxing Day when the unusual injury fucked him up.  Just to make sure that he keeps calm and doesn't panic, his manager described it as:
[A] horrific injury... "It's absolutely disgusting. He's going to be very sore, and I'm sure his wife won't be too happy either
So that should be fine then.  I just have this vision of George Clooney and some other dude from ER running on the pitch and holding up one of those green vinyl things on the bottom half of his body and shouting "just don't look down man, it's gonna be OK" and Chris Whelpdale unable to prevent himself going into shock as he realises the only reason he became a footballer in the first place is under threat.  To bang sluts.

I haven't even found out how he did it yet but I don't think I want to know.  I've seen enough things on the internet to realise that this is not one of those things I should type into Google.