Before he scored the opening goal in yesterday's Chelsea v Man City game, Mario Balotelli once again invited the wrath of Roberto Mancini by breaking curfew to have a midnight curry.
Mario's punishment for breaking the curfew imposed by Mancini 48 hours before a match has resulted in a £150,000 fine, making this curry cost only slightly less than one from that restaurant up the road from me when you ask for water and they bring you a massive bottle of it instead of stuff from the tap.
Balotelli spent some time in the popular 'Zouk' restaurant in Manchester's city centre with his friends and was doing really well to avoid detection from anyone who might give the game away until he started having a sword fight with rolling pins. So whoever it was that told the press about that is a real dick. You cost Mario Balotelli £150,000 so I hope you feel bad about that. You could probably just ask him for that amount of money to help build a giant bouncy castle and he'd give you it and no-one had better steal that idea from me because it's my only hope of getting a house like that.