Saturday, 10 December 2011

Harry Redknapp: The FA are Hypocrites - we know

Harry Redknapp has accused the FA of double standards. Wayne Rooney was rightly awarded a three-match ban from UEFA for hoofing someone up the arse. The FA were faced with the realisation that they were losing their best player for the entire group stage at next year's Euros but have successfully appealed the decision.

Wayne Rooney's ban has been reduced to two games. The same Wayne Rooney that the FA did their best to make public enemy number one after saying "fucking what?" into the camera earlier this year. It was the footballing equivalent of a public castration. I think it was this year, I can't be hooped actually bothering to find out. 

Redknapp is pissed off because everyone knows violent conduct is a three-game ban. Just like we all know Cliff Richard is gay and Ashley Cole is a cunt. If you even bothered to appeal it, the FA would increase the ban for wasting their time. Now clubs can appeal using the Wayne Rooney argument. "Well you appealed his blatantly violent, intentional kick so what's the difference between that and this?"

Of course Harry's right, the FA are fucking idiots, hypocrites, twats, arse-holes, smug bell-ends and they've made themselves look like the self-important, self-serving, spineless nob-jockeys that we all know they are. What I don't understand is why UEFA reduced the ban?

"Hi UEFA, please don't ban Wayne for three games. He is our best player!
"Well it's violent conduct, that's an automatic three-match ban. I'm sorry there's nothing we can do"
"What if I leave this massive sack of money over here and when I turn around, perhaps that giant sack of money disappears?"
"What sack of money"

That's how I believe the completely made up, imaginary scenario went down. Don't sue you me you corrupt bastards. I've had great fun swearing in this article.