Wednesday, 4 May 2011

Sevilla want Roman to be their (ro)man

The elusive and cunning Sportsmail Reporter has used all of his detective powers to uncover a summer transfer scandal of terrifying proportions!  Roman Pavlyuchenko might leave Spurs this summer.


According to the Mail we can exclusively reveal:
Sevilla are interested in Tottenham striker Roman Pavlyuchenko. The Spanish side are keen on the 29-year-old as they have sold Luis Fabiano and former Spurs forward Frederic Kanoute is set to leave in the summer. 
What might look on the surface to be lazy, guess-work journalism is actually the product of months of under-cover surveillance and I would know because my Uncle used to be a detective!  It was never spoken of to protect his identity and we could never talk about it in front of other adults incase they too "were undercover" but I know that he was because he used to put on a large trench-coat and sneak out during the night to spy on evil-doers.  As a child of course curiosity got the better of me and I had to follow him about on some nights - at first it was hard to see him hiding in the bushes that he chose but he really got a good view of those girl's windows.  I even got to see boobs but of course he probably wouldn't have noticed that.  Being a detective must be an awesome job.

I haven't seen my Uncle for a while.