Wednesday, 6 April 2011

Wayne Rooney is fucking banned


Mischievous, young Wayne Rooney has received a 2 match ban from the FA for shouting 'fucking hell' and 'fucking (something, I still can't work it out)' directly into a tv camera.  Interestingly the BBC still broadcast it despite editing the game for Match of the Day so...

Rooney has appealed the ban but accepted the charge anyway and I can only imagine that Alex Ferguson is delighted with both parties in this coming together of football brains.  On one side we have the television company that he avoids as though they were trolls, and on the other we have someone who simply behaves like a troll and who will balloon in size the minute he stops being a professional athlete.  Wayne Rooney's waistline is absolutely terrified for the hell it is going to endure in about 10 years as he munches his way through as much monster munch as possible.  I can insult these players you see because I am super, super fit and could easily outrun a bus; I'm also great at football.  I work with someone who used to be a paratrooper incidentally, and he used to actually have a race with the bus to get home and would regularly win.  Against a fucking bus.