Sunday, 24 April 2011

Messi is quite good at football

Lionel Messi continued to defy the laws of the world and scored his 50th goal of this campaign for Barcelona on Saturday.  In spain!  That's in Europe.

Jose Mourinho has demanded that Messi has to play next season wearing a bin liner to make things fairer.  The theory is that if he can't see where he is, nor run, he probably can't score as many goals unless those growth hormones he was gorging on as a youth have given him super powers.  He might actually be like Super Man in that awful teen drama where he plays american football and is really, really good but just doesn't run as fast as he could, because 800mph is faster than young adults usually run and people would start to question it.  If you start seeing flying saucers floating around Spain it's Messi's home planet telling him to fucking wise up before the humans realise that the things he's doing shouldn't be possible.  I'm on to you Lionel!